Untrained Eyes

Past lives in a wall of mist
Which of them would you like to see today
Perhaps the lives where I sat in a cave
Have I told you of them

I remember I died violently
Odd to think that after all that quiet
All that deep intense meditation
Chanting and praying
The cold nights of ice and snow
Deep in my mountain cave
That I would die from a knife

Then I returned to the same mountains
One would think it was the same life
Hadn’t I had enough of meditation
Hadn’t I prayed myself out yet
No. I prayed and chanted still
How many lives of this did I need

And again I died violently
What kind of Karma was I carrying
This time they shot me
Shot me in the head and chest
My vision turning red and then black
And then I returned to the Bardo

But still I did not give up
Again I returned to the mountains
High up in the Himalayas
With the air so thin and cruel
Still I chanted and contemplated
And waited for death’s hand
And again I died violently
For what? What did it gain me?

This is what it was for
I knew too much
My vision was too disciplined
I needed to empty my cup
And let go of what I knew
So that I could see you
As you really are
With untrained eyes

Yamabuki
April 2010
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